Why Do I Say Nothing Is Wrong When Something IS Wrong?

Episode 21: “I’m Fine” – The Trauma Behind Saying Nothing’s Wrong When Everything Is
In this soul-stirring episode of The Trauma Queen, Jessica Ella unpacks one of the most common trauma responses in relationships: shutting down, staying silent, and saying “I’m fine” when you’re anything but.

Why do we deny our truth, expect our partners to read our minds, and struggle to voice what we actually feel? The answer lies in trauma—specifically, the kind of emotional wounds that taught us to stay small, stay safe, and never rock the boat.

🧠 Inside this episode, you’ll explore:

• How unhealed trauma, especially from childhood or past abuse, wires us to suppress instead of express

• Why silence can be a triggered response rooted in fear, not manipulation

• The subconscious belief that asking for what we need makes us a burden

• The identity shifts required to move from emotional shutdown to honest, vulnerable communication

• How to stop projecting communication struggles onto your partner—and start owning your voice

Jess shares deeply personal insights into her own healing, how she learned to identify what’s actually wrong beneath the shutdown, and how nervous system safety plays a key role in being able to speak up.

This episode is a loving call-out and a trauma-informed guide for anyone who has ever said, “Nothing’s wrong” when everything inside them was screaming otherwise. It’s time to choose connection over protection—and learn how to feel truly seen, heard, and healed in your relationships.

💫 Ready to stop silencing yourself and start sharing your truth? Begin here: https://linktr.ee/jessellaainsworth