Why Do I Get The Ick When...?

Episode 25: Why Your “Icks” Might Actually Be Trauma (And Not Just Bad Vibes)
In this laugh-out-loud and eye-opening episode of The Trauma Queen, Jessica Ella and returning guest Steph J dive into the world of “icks”—those weird, sudden turn-offs that hit like a wave of cringe. From tight jeans and spiritual narcissists to revving cars and weird sandwich behavior, the list is hilarious… but the why behind it might surprise you.

Turns out, many “icks” aren’t just shallow judgments—they’re often triggers rooted in trauma, emotional wounds, or values misalignment. Some might be red flags. Others? Echoes of unhealed identity issues or past abuse dynamics that your nervous system still remembers, even if your mind doesn’t.

😅 In this episode, you’ll laugh and learn:

• Why certain behaviors give you “the ick”—and why they hit so hard

• How your “ick” might actually be a trauma response (yep, even the sandwich one)

• When to lean into introspection vs. when to trust your instinct and walk away

• The difference between a passing “ick” and a boundary-violating trigger

• How getting curious about your icks can lead to more healed, aligned relationships

This one’s part playful roast, part psychological deep-dive, and 100% relatable for anyone navigating the dating world with a trauma-informed lens (and a sense of humor).

💫 Ready to decode your dating icks and uncover what they’re really pointing to? Start here: https://linktr.ee/jessellaainsworth